in the beginning

I was born in Alliance, Ohio 3/21/68. My parents were divorced at the age of 4. I recall the last night.. I remember them fighting, and my mother throwing him out. He worked at a drop forge, by day, and bar tended at night. He had been drinking, and I remember her yelling about a woman...  I only remember these things because that night has played over and over in my mind for about 39 years.... I remember him reaching down to pick me, and as I went to him, she screamed, a bloody scream yelling no, dont take my baby...... I lowered my arms and ran to her, she held me as we watched him leave.. Three years later he committed suicide...... Ive never forgotten . I often felt if I had gone w/him like I wanted to he would still be alive. I know thats not true. I couldnt change the situation. I was a child, but thats how I felt growing up....